Empowerment
LuLaRoe is no stranger to making claims that sound good in theory, but as time marches on, very little seems to be happening in practice. LLR claims to embrace the bodies of all women. Big, small, straight or curvy- these styles (arguably) embrace them all. (Hell if I can make an Amelia look good on me, but ok... sure.) They claim that the fabrics are all unique to them. But that was debunked by Patrick's email, claiming that up to 10% of their patterns are purchased, and hence could be seen somewhere like Target. They claim that you can gain financial independence. But if you're struggling, it's because you need to buy more to sell more and stop being a victim. I feel like the later portion of that statement is ironic. They are telling you to give them all your money, but then don't complain when you don't have any. I'm lost... The biggest claim that I find most insulting is the claim that they empower women. Is this the point where I fall out of my chair laughing...? No. This is where I lean in, lower my head to meet you in eye contact, gently grab your shoulders and say- "I'm worried." I am worried.
EMPOWERMENT:
em·pow·er·ment
/əmˈpouərmənt/
noun
1.authority or power given to someone to do something:"individuals are given empowerment to create their own dwellings"
LuLaRoe claims that through fashion, they empower women. I assume the original message was for women of all shapes and walks to feel confident in their own skin- which is a beautiful thing, and one reason I jumped into the cult bus. I relished in the idea of a brand that celebrated women of all shapes. For me that was the classics. I loved the Julia and the Cassie. Styles that weren't a trend in staple patterns and solids. I jumped all over those. My body has been a huge focus for me. I went from being in fantastic shape to grossly obese. The last ten years of my life has been a rollercoaster of weight loss and gain as a result of pregnancy, poor decisions, chocolate, more poor decisions, and finally a litany of autoimmune diagnoses. This past year has been a steady weight decline for me, finally. But it started off with that- "Ok, I'm losing the weight but my body still looks really weird in clothes." I had been living in my husband's sweatpants for the last few years, and I was over it. So when his clothes became to big, I found leggings. They made me feel comfy without feeling like I was homeless. Cute little patterns all over them, versatility, etc. They were way more feminine than sweats. So that's what roped me in. This whole comfort aspect of it. I found the sizing to be freakish and just a lie. I'm in no way, shape or form an extra small anything. I'm 5'9", a size 8 (and shrinking) 36DD, size 10 shoe. There's nothing about me that's small. Thankfully, I can no longer say "fat"... I earned it, but I was very abusive to myself over it. I didn't understand why I was fat, even when I had changed my diet and removed the poor decisions. Having the autoimmune diagnosis was the catalyst for the major changes, and understanding now how my body works has given me tools to fight. Empowerment comes from knowledge for me. Understanding why I was fat and how to change it gave me the tools to fight it. THAT is empowerment. LuLaRoe served a purpose to hide my extra lumps and bumps as I trim down my size and work on getting my figure where I want it to be. But there was only so long I wanted to hide behind a baggy dolman either... Nothing about LuLaRoe empowered me. I'm not knocking them at all for it not working for me- I'm just stating that my understanding of empowerment is different than the message they deliver. But then they take empowerment and they use it to describe what they do for their consultants, and that's when I start to really grow beef with them. Empowerment is the giving of permission to make a change. To take control of something. I don't think there is anything a consultant is really in control of when she signs up for LuLaRoe. She can pick styles and sizes. But not patterns. She can't control production, and can't control costs. She can't control where she sells, or how she advertises. She can't control the direction the company takes, and she can't control the ultimate outcome. I don't care what they TELL you- this is all a fact. It's outlined in the consultant contract as well. They don't deliver it the same way I just did, but law is just another language, and no matter how they put the words together on the paper, it's still right there in black and white. Empowerment is a strong word that I believe should be reserved for instances of oppression. Freeing the slaves, giving women the right to vote, Roe v. Wade- all of those are instances of empowerment. Legally handing control of an situation, putting the outcome in the hand of the individual to control. If you decide to sell leggings from the trunk of your car instead of selling in a facebook group is not empowerment. Wrestling yourself into a pair of ticking time bomb leggings, trying not to sneeze too hard, lest you burst a buttcheek out of your pants- is not empowerment. A mentor telling you where you should shop, who you should align yourself with, what online facebook groups you can even belong to- lest you be punished by being removed from her team page is NOT empowerment. Just in the last few hours, the mentor that I posted the KKK videos about released a statement in her group defending her statement about the KKK. She claims that she was using that as an example for why you should be aware of the groups you're in and make sure they align with your values. She then invites anyone who doesn't want to be in her group to leave- go solo, start their own group. What is a legging seller with no mentor? Would she be a Ronin? Is it the same as a masterless Samurai? Should we commit seppuku if we disgrace them by posting links in a garage sale site? I jest, but the point here is this: you can't unsay what you said. I understand her comparison for dramatic effect, I do. I think it was in poor taste, but that's ok- I didn't order the meal. What I take issue with is the threat of disownment. If you're there, you can't be here, with me. Do you still collect a bonus on the downlines who've been removed from your little cool kid club, or do you return that 1, 3, or 5% back to the company? Just curious. Your sole job once you become a mentor is to MENTOR and guide. Nowhere in the definition of mentor is there a provision for threats or iron fisted rule. I think these mentors are ill equipped a lot of times to manage anyone, let alone in a company that offers little to no real direction of any value. Giving seminars and lectures on overcoming the victim mentality doesn't really offer any skillset to these women to run a successful business. And thinking you can only worked for the Little Engine That Could... otherwise there would be a whole lot more people thinking themselves right into wealth. It just doesn't happen that way. And while we're feigning success, shall we write imaginary checks to those bills that come due or what? Empowerment on a personal level comes from within. It's a process. The party determines a goal she would like to achieve, she sets a path, and decides what tools are needed- and she grants HERSELF permission to take that step. A pair of leggings doesn't do that for you. Legging Jesus standing in a sweatshop, arms stretched out like "Behold the glory which I have bestowed upon you" doesn't give you permission to be successful. YOU DO. You want to be empowered? Decide what it is you want- and go do it. There's no magical formula, no single product, and NO LEADER that can get you there if you don't lead yourself. Stop making other people rich and go do it for yourself. If you're willing to sacrifice time with your family to play Barbies with your mannequin for hours on end just to pad DeAnne's pockets- why can't you do that for yourself? You want to hashtag LuLaRoe, and how it changed your life, start here: #becauseIleftLuLaRoe #becauseIleftLuLaRoe, I wrote a book. I get emails every day thanking me for telling the truth so many were afraid to say. Because I left LuLaRoe, I'm spending MORE time with my family. I didn't have to put my children to work as directed by LuLaMentors. I didn't have to sign a merchant agreement and expose myself to potential liability. Because I left LuLaRoe, I get to spend more time on my blog- and talking to every one of you. Anyone who has written in will tell you I make a real effort to answer everyone. I've been entrusted with a lot of information from so many of you- with the understanding that I'm to use it to get it out there- TO HELP WOMEN EMPOWER THEMSELVES. This morning, I got a short but sweet email saying- "Because of your blog, I got my tax return and I'm done with LuLaRoe." As flattering as that is, and as much as it warms me that I'm reaching someone- don't do it because I told you to. Do what feels right to you. I'm just here to give you the information. What you choose to do with it is up to you. But think about it. While you're being told by mentors to think twice about what you align with, to ignore complaints, focus on your 'business'... what's that quote? 50 million Elvis fans can't be wrong? The defective following is growing. There's a reason for that. At some point the defective will outweigh the consultants in numbers. And then what? I reiterate- this isn't about hatred for the company. I have said a million times that I think the original plan was a good one. The products were quality made, the number of consultants was limited, and that was the dream everyone bought. If they cared about the consultants as much as they say they do, they would stop onboarding, fix the quality issues, and offer real training and guidance for the people that are on the front line for them.
Through education grows knowledge. Through knowledge, there is power. That is the path to becoming empowered. It starts with just one step forward- make a decision.